Black Girl Problems
These black girl problems don’t belong to me or any of my beautiful black girls they belong to society. In society’s need to define and categorize me, several terms and phrases have been coined. However, I choose not to buy into any of it. The reality is we come in so many shapes, tones, volumes, and textures that no one term or one way of being will ever contain all of this “woman”. But they tried it, check out the top 5 problems society claims I, as a black woman, have…
1. You are too Independent?
64% of black children are raised in homes with absent fathers. Let me clarify my independence was forged out of necessity not desire. To be independent is to not depend on or be contingent upon something else for existence or operation. Yes I have created a life in which I can exist and operate without depending on you. That does not negate the fact that my being was created to connect. Don’t let my efficiency or strength define yours.
2. You have a princess complex?
In many cases this just means I have expectations of you in which are not wavering. Have you watched any of the documentaries about blacks in the past 40 years? One thing that resonates with me is that those men loved their women. Not just loved… adored, treasured, and respected them. When did we lose that?
3. Either I’m too much or not enough.
As black women we catch a lot flack for just being us. We come in all shapes, tones, volumes, colors, and styles. Don’t compare our spirit and temperament to anyone else. We were created uniquely and the role we have played in society has created a rainbow of African-American women. WE JUST ARE
4. Your butt is too big
Well America has recently declared BIG BUTTS in. #thanksKimK We have been rocking big butts for years now and our black men have always been fans.
5. You are a light-skinned chick or you are a dark-skinned chick?
As a dark-skinned chick I grew up hearing, “you are beautiful for a dark-skinned woman.” There seems to always be someone out there defining our skin tone, creating an opposition of light-skinned vs dark-skinned. My light-skinned friends don’t act like light-skinned chicks nor to do my dark-skinned friends act like dark-skinned chicks. They all stand in their own individuality. Start seeing us as such!!!
6. You are too angry & ghetto
I am not angry nor am I ghetto. We are people just like you. I am passionate and alive and I communicate as such. If I intimidate you with my confidence that is your problem.
All of these things you use to define me as a black woman are such small parts of the makeup of who I truly am. I am this and so much more.
You define who you are and display that light to the world.
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