Finding Your True Friends
Finding true friends is always a journey for anyone. I’m sure we’ve all experienced those “fake friends” and had those terrible moments, but hopefully we’ve started to weed those people out of our lives.
I’ve learned many lessons thus far in life, but the biggest lesson of them all comes from friendships. I pride myself on being loyal and I know that being a great friend is something that no one can take away from me, but everyone doesn’t value friendship the same.
In the past I’ve always been the person to try and salvage friendships, but as I’ve gotten older I’ve come to realize that I don’t have nor want to always be the bigger person. When is it the other persons turn? Friendships are just like relationships and they need to be nurtured.
More importantly I feel that you owe yourself better than to be dealing with friendships that are in fact half-ass. You know what friendship I’m speaking of because you’re thinking about them at this very moment.
What is a true friend?
A true friend is a person who sticks by you through thick and thin and is accepting of who you are. They allow you to make mistakes but call you out when you’re wrong. They are present in your life, forgiving and make you want to better yourself. Most important they make the friendship a priority.
Unfortunately, a lot of us experience “friends” not being supportive of our dreams or goals. If we’re friends why wouldn’t you want me to succeed sis? No matter what it is and how your friend may feel about it I think it’s better to just support and ask questions later.
Keeps those friends who are supportive and who are going to help you chase your dreams. Those friends are important. There is nothing better than a friend who feeds you positivity. I can’t stand those friends who always bring you drama, like girl WHO CARES?
Friendships have their ups and downs and they’re not always going to be perfect, but when you take a step back and analyze the friendship ask yourself is it beneficial to you. Are you constantly giving and receiving nothing?
Ask yourself is this friendship one-sided. That tends to be the case most of the time. People find their self being more of a friend than the person is being to them. Friendships are just like relationships, relationships are just like jobs and jobs are hard work.
If you don’t believe me watch an episode of Girlfriends. They were always going through it. You just have to find the ones worth going through it with.
No more putting time and effort into pointless friendships. The same energy you give is the same energy you shall receive. If you’re constantly the person reaching out to your friends stop reaching out and see who checks up on you. Those are your real friends.
I’m not saying just ditch your friends, but what I am saying is figure out who your real friends are. Everybody looks at friendships differently and something that is not okay with you could possibly be okay with your friend.
Example: I hate when a friend of mine shares my personal business with another friend of ours. They may think this is okay, but it’s up to you to let them know it’s not and see if they stop doing it.
Things like that are serious, but they’re petty. You may want to cut ties with the friend if they don’t stop another person may see it fit to continue the friendship, but now they have that “I know I can’t tell her ass shit” mood about them, so they cater to their friends differently. Everyone is different.
Friendships are important to have. They’re the people you make the most memories with, so find you someone who is going to fix your bun when arguing.
Find someone who is going to be there to wipe the tears off your face even though this might be the 10th time crying over the same guy. It’s not your job to judge your friend, but to be there for them in their time of need no matter how they got to be in the position that they’re in.
Sure, you’re not going to agree with everything your friend does, but you have to let them live their life as well.
Most importantly stay true to yourself. Never alter who you are to be friends who someone. Real friends accept you for who you are.
Miranda Brown39 Posts
My name is Miranda Brown. I am a proud Alumna of Tennessee State University class of 2016. I am from Franklin, TN a small town right outside of Nashville. I am very much so an introvert, but I do tend to sometimes come out of my shell as I'm known as the extra-dramatic friend. I love writing and blogging even more. My favorite quote is, "reality is wrong. dreams are real" - Tupac. I'm all about being positive and spreading good vibes.