Many of us have already experienced that if we desire something, dream about something and tell others about it, then the plan, desire and the possibility of its realization come to naught. It’s like “closing” the project, desire. But why does this happen? There may be some kind of soma magic behind it, or the universe conspires against us if we hit a big drum, what do we want?
But why do I say at all?
Mental Research Four things that can motivate us to share our desires and goals with someone. The first is accountability. We believe that if we say this, we must also pursue the goal, otherwise our environment will consider us a fraud and a liar. But this is not true, most people do not care enough about the other to pay attention to whether they are on the way to their goal.
Another reason is purposeful exaggeration: cool glances, flattering words, and attention make us feel good.
But maybe we want approval because we’re not sure what the goal is, and we don’t know if it’s too challenging or if our environment will accept it. We are waiting for you to praise us and strengthen us in our goal.
Similar to this, when we reveal purpose due to encouragement and stimulation: if our environment praises the planTherefore, for our diligence, it can make you more diligent.
target experience
Peter Gollwitzer is a professor in the Department of Psychology at New York University seekHow goals and plans affect cognition, emotions, and behaviour. She asked her students to write down two activities that they would do in the next week to achieve their biggest goal. Half of the students were asked the paper, and the experimenter read it aloud and acknowledged what they had written. The other group was told that no one would look at their newspaper.
All participants were called again the following week and asked to recall the goals they had scored in the previous week. Then they had to write down the amount of time they spent on the activities to achieve the goals. Those whose goals were read to them by the experimenter were not as diligent on the tasks as those whose goals were not read to them.
What do we say to the brain?
But what happens brainIn what distracts our behavior that deviates from the pursuit of purpose?
Dr. Peter M. Fishton to meWhen we tell our plans, a sense of early completeness arises in the brain, the gap between intention and behavior widens, while vivid mental pictures of a bright future are created in our heads.
An increase in dopamine occurs in the brain, as if we have successfully achieved our goal.
It becomes unclear what we need to do, because as soon as we say it, we begin to feel complacent, as if we have already achieved some part of our goal, but this is just a false sense of accomplishment. When our friends and family verbally congratulate us on a project that only exists, our brains are already interpreting it as a success, and this self-deception can get in the way of true success.
Therefore, it is good not to forget that it is not worth communicating our desires and goals to our environment ahead of time, as this may make their realization unrealistic.
(Cover image: Getty Images)
